Ask the Techiquette- “Is it appropriate to reply all and request to be removed?”

Techiquette:

I think the topics covered so far (and the ones noted for future posts) are excellent. I think your “Rule #2″ is bang on!!!

If it’s a group of people with a shared interest in all responses to a topic, great. Otherwise, hit reply all and ensure you remove recipients that don’t ‘need to know’ or care what you might have to say.

It is a huge pet-peeve when I get caught up in receiving what I would consider “junk mail,” especially when I can’t get off the distribution list until the thread stops or unless I “reply-all” and request to be removed.

That said… is it appropriate to “reply-all” and request to be removed? And how to do you do that without sounding as irritated as you feel at that moment in time?

B

B:

First, thank you very much for your question regarding the appropriate way to request to be removed from a reply all list. Due to the hoards of e-mail that we receive each day, this question is pertinent to all.

Next, the answer to your question, is “no,” the appropriate way for getting removed from a reply all list is not by “replying-all” and requesting “all” to remove you. Instead, the “best practice” for getting removed from a “reply-all” list is for you or a hypothetical you: “Ms. B&I” (Ms. Busy and Important), to respond to the “originator,” the one who wrote the first e-mail to all of the “reply-all” recipients, and ask the originator to be removed from the “reply-all” list.

This solution solves the problem of not wanting to be the “party pooper,” the person who ruins the “party;” the “party” being the “reply-all” chain of e-mails.

“Ms. B&I,” will notice one fallacy in this solution: people, besides who the originator, the only person who knows that “Ms. B&I” does not want to be on the “reply-all” list,  will no doubt add “Ms. B&I” back onto the “reply-all” list when they see that she is missing from the list.

Between you and Techiquette, those people, who add people back on a reply all list, have a little too much time on their hands. That said, it is an issue that needs to be addressed. Unfortunately, for “Ms. B&I,” she must personally write each person, who adds her back on the list, and ask to him or her to remove her from the list.

Ms. B&I” shows tactfulness and respect for the reply all list by replying individually to each person, who adds “Ms. B&I” back on the list. Replying individually to each person protects “Ms. B&I” from appearing pretentious or too “busy and important” to be a part of the “reply-all” e-mail list.

Let’s just be brutally honest though: “Ms. B&I” is too “busy and important” to be a part of the reply all list.

Thanks for your question B!

Sincerely,

Techiquette